'my friends call me g.raft'.

g....raft.

sayitoutloud.

Whaaaat?

edinburgh is the mecca for giraffes.

sad giraffe is sad.

gi-reefer MADNESS.

Giraf Beer

We support Giraf Beer. Rate it HERE.

giROUGH

gio-raffe.

pretty swagtastic motherfucker.

Robert Capa, Cordova 1936

its business time.

9.30am.

chilling in the business class lounge in frankfurt.

its really cool, they have a bar with free acacia leaves for me to nibble on and a high ceiling for me to stretch out my long neck. they don't mind when i poop on the floor either. the germans (ze GERMANS) know how to live, and they certainly know how to treat their giraffes. i'm going to stretch my neck out then look around quizzically. because giraffes like to do that.

bye guiz.

Giraffe in my loft!

Weebl you never disappoint.

this giraffe is going to scotland.

next post will be coming from edinburgh!

GAPT Tribute Performance at MTV VMAs

Thank You Lady Gaga and Brian May.

what time is it, signor giraffe? its time for you to shut up and get me a jagermeister.

giraffes are fickle creatures. i guess. i don't really know what i'm talking about but i needed a cool appropriate picture for this post.

i like giraffes, especially particular ones. moreover, i like people that share my undying passion for giraffes, even if it means confusing me beyond belief. certain giraffe lovers like myself ar epretty fancy. and i like them (a little.)

i guess i need to keep this post relevant to giraffes and giraffe related paraphernalia but i sort of just feel like writing. as a fellow giraffe lover told me tonight around 3am "you just need the right words." (to express things.) and that's really hard.

thank you fellow giraffe lover, i'm still kind of drunk (i'm like 2 ft tall) but i salute you. you're the best giraffe lover i've ever met.

ever.

You may take their lives...

...but you'll never take their freedom!

I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

....Wait what?

"

Well you know what they say, Mark

...That love is blind.

OG ELEGANT GIRAFFE SWAG

AND WE BELIEVE YOU, PRESIDENT.

Did you know?

"The giraffe’s fur serves as a chemical defence, and is full of antibiotics and parasite repellents that gives the animal a characteristic scent."

Clearly, giraffes rule.

Wanted: Dead or Alive

Promote our cause with our top of the line giraffe hats.

You too can pick up your very own Giraffe hats for the small fee of $56.00. 50% of all cash recieved goes to our renowned crack cocaine rehabilitation programme.

crack induced seagull slaughter

Do you want your neighbourhood giraffe to turn into a merciless killer? This real life footage is taken of a young giraffe named Jerry. Jerry lived a good life...Until the day he gave into peer pressure and took a hit from his friend's crack pipe. Jerry eventually went insane, and started stealing from his parents for money to support his habit. Out on a crazy crack induced rampage, he unknowingly trampled and killed this small, innocent bird. "Once you go crack you never go back." Is what they used to say. Now, with our 90 world-wide rehabilitation centres, we are helping giraffes like Jerry break his habit...And stay out of prison. Over 10000000000000000000000000000000 giraffes and other creatures world wide are affected by crack cocaine, both directly and indirectly. Crack tears lives apart. Little Billy seagull did not even see his tenth birthday. Keep this poison out of our zoos and savannas and other temperate to warm and sandy climates!

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all giraffes are created equal." [Martin Luther King]

This has been a public service announcement.

As a citizen of the world, and a pioneer to the giraffe cause, it is every giraffe lover's duty to keep their giraffes off crack cocaine. Symptoms of crack addiction in giraffes include heightened alertness, insomnia, loss of appetite, nausea and vomiting and a generally really unpleasant and pissed off giraffe. Giraffes usually hide their crack pipes in their larger than average mouth cavities or in their rectums for safe keeping. These should both be the first places to look if you are suspicious that your giraffe, or a giraffe you love, is addicted to crack cocaine.